It's been a long time since......

Been a long time since I stopped venting my frustrations in this way... Or rather keep those memories somewhere and carry on wif my life. These memories are so heavy that i find them a burden... haha....

attachment is starting tom, and i have no idea why me hands and feet are cold and calmy... yes, i'm stressed cos i haven't revised, i still believe that last min studying won't help- that's my Xcuse for not revising at all... hahha I have NEVER in my life consistently keep up to my so-called revision timetable... Procrastination is the devil deeply rooted in me. No matter how much i tell myself to kick this habit..... the devil eventually triumph over the little me- who is desperately trying to make a difference... sigh... self-pity starting to surface again.

Enough of school, in 2.5 years time i'll be thrown unwillingly into the working society. It's impossible to continue to study, cos i'm not born into a rich family with a silver spoon in my mouth. Crude, but sadly true, i dun blame my parents..... they have other things to worry about. hard to imagine myself working... hahha even though i'm already slogging as a part-timer now... my life is no longer driven by future.... although at times i do fantasize abt that cozy home, the lavishing mini and... they are just mere castles in the air, easily dashed by the existing realities. so now i live day by day, squirming and dodging obstacles dropped by the "man up there", running away from the claws of the "meritocratic" society....